Wigs and Things

Today is better! As was yesterday! Firstly, I saw my therapist in the morning, who, when I told her about my ex's insensitivity about already staying out all night with another woman the day after we filed our divorce papers (insert salt-in-wound here), said simply, and I am paraphrasing here, ''Are you really surprised? After all, wasn't it his lack of empathy that brought you to this point in the first place? He can't help it, you know that. This is just who he is. He doesn't mean for it to be that way, but still, it hurts you. This is why it isn't working anymore.'' Pattern of behavior . In the clear light of day, I realized that. He genuinely is oblivious that doing such a thing would be hurtful to me, just as he was oblivious that all of the other things were hurtful to me, too. I have learned you cannot teach a person empathy, either it is something they possess or it is something they do not. Lastly, I arrived at the yoga studio at 6:1

The last few days have been rough, friends... On Friday the lawyer finally got around to officially filing our divorce papers. So even though we aren't legally divorced until early-mid August, for all intents and purposes we are divorced. On Saturday, my ex went out. We had decided to start implementing the his Saturday/my Saturday now, so we are used to the routine when I move out. That was his Saturday. He went out from 6 p.m. to 4 a.m. He took an uber, wore his new shirt he bought earlier that day, new hair gel in his hair. He has never in the 12 years I have known him stayed out until 4 a.m., except for that time we were at a Full Moon Party in Koh Phangan in 2007. The early hours of the Full Moon Party Koh Phangan, Thailand, February 2007 At 2:45 a.m. I woke up to get my daughter water and saw he wasn't home. I called, and he didn't answer. I texted saying I was worried, and he replied saying he was on his way home. He didn't say where he was. At

''The girl who had cancer, I really like her. She's pretty cool''. ''The girl who had cancer likes you, too'', I replied, overhearing a comment made by the friend of a friend at her 4th of July party yesterday. ''Oh my God, I am so sorry. I didn't know you were right there'', she responded. ''Sorry about what? The part where you said that you like me, or the part or where you said I was pretty cool? Or the cancer part? It's okay, I mean I did have cancer...''. It made me wonder how often I am privately referred to as ''The Girl Who Had Cancer.'' Like when I go into the diner, do they say, ''Oh yeah, she comes in all the time. She had cancer ''. Or at my kid's school, do they say, ''That's so-and so's mom. You know, the one who had cancer ''. I feel like a Scarlett letter has been placed upon me forever. My new job doesn't know that